What it Feels Like to Face Infertility

December 5, 2019 at 5:00 AM
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When you're struggling with infertility, it's not unusual to feel as though your emotions are alien. Sometimes you may find it difficult to describe your feelings to those who aren't infertile. Or, if you're friends with someone who's struggling with their infertility, you may want to do whatever you can to empathize with them. I regularly help couples who are suffering from infertility. With my Chapel Hill infertility counseling, I have the opportunity to interact with couples and individuals who are struggling with infertility. Because of this, I'm able to provide some insights into how it feels.

Out of control

Many couples discover that they're infertile when they're actively trying to become pregnant. Typically, my patients will visit me because they've spent months (or even years) trying to conceive. Over that time, they'll try to find ways to make themselves healthier to resolve the problem. By the time they reach my office, they're confused as to what is wrong.

Couples who cannot conceive despite trying every avenue available usually feel as though everything is out of their control. I often meet individuals who are scared that they won't be able to gain control of their fertility. When they feel the need to come to my office, placing their fertility in someone else's hands may sometimes make the lack of control feel worse.

Quite alone

Although couples who are infertile know that other people suffer from the same problem, they still feel alone. When I meet couples who are infertile, they're usually surrounded by friends and family who can conceive and have families. As a result, they feel isolated in their experience.

If you're a couple suffering from infertility, you may benefit from talking to others who are in your situation. However, if you don't feel as though talking to other couples will prove useful, it's perfectly acceptable not to.

Emotional rollercoasters

No two couples' infertility stories are the same. But in my experience, many of them experience emotional rollercoasters. They may feel heartbroken when they see a negative test, excited at the prospect of treatment, and then anxious as they wait to see how matters progress.

Using my infertility counseling service can help you manage those emotional highs and lows. You may find that seeking counseling is particularly important if you've suffered a pregnancy loss as a part of your journey. 

Emotionally drained

Both men and women can feel emotionally drained by infertility. Some even go as far as saying that they feel like failures. Although societal pressure to reproduce isn't the same as it used to be, many see having children as a personal goal. When I counsel couples, they often feel frustrated with themselves.

When couples feel emotionally drained, they sometimes find that their relationship suffers. If you're one of those people, it's important to seek some form of counseling. Counseling helps you both navigate your emotions together so that you can maintain the strength in your relationship.

Frustrated by others

Many people give well-meaning advice to those who are suffering from infertility. A lot of the couples who walk through my doors say that this can feel frustrating.

Advice such as "relax and it will happen" can feel quite isolating to those who suffer from infertility. Although people who say such things often have the best intentions, they're not always helping the matter.

If you're suffering from infertility, I provide counseling in Chapel Hill to single parents and couples. Together, I can work through your journey and help you navigate its stresses. To make an appointment, call 919 257 1735.